Sunday, October 24, 2010

Mad* Trite, and VERY Annoying

*Meaning similar to wicked or hella (neither of which have become trite yet, I don't think).


I could almost scream!!!!

These are the 12 most annoying expressions I hear almost every day, not in order of their frequency or anything else:

too much on my plate -Too busy (lazy) to take on more responsibility; only thinks about eating and is prolly full of whatever is on her plate.

on the same page - To look at an issue from the same perspective. (If it's the same book :=P )

no problem - What's no problem? Being nice? Doing your job? Are you too haughty to say "you're welcome"?

that's just wrong - Egregiously (or impossibly), but often just humorously, wrong... But sometimes it isn't wrong at all, just wrong. (I sorta like this one. It could have a permanent place in our idiomatic lexicon).

don't go there - When this is said, you are usually already on the subject to be avoided... Otherwise, self explanatory.

think outside the box - Hackneyed, but this one will stay with us. (Do the "Nine Dots Puzzle," a.k.a. the "Christopher Columbus Egg Puzzle." The solution lies outside the square.)

my bad - Baby talk... I did it, but don't hold me responsible. Use of an adjective instead of the noun "mistake" is intended to be cute, I guess.

go for it - Do I need your permission?

you go, girl - A portable Feminine Urination Device (FUD) http://www.go-girl.com/what-is-gogirl.asp. Allows a woman to pee anywhere, but provides no privacy. (Available in pink or camouflage.)

too much information - Usually not too much, just something you don't want to see, hear, etc., because it is distasteful, or like the You Go Girl FUD, just shouldn't be discussed in normal conversation.

I am not going to lie to you - Huh? I thought you were. (If you need to state that what you tell me next is not going to be a lie, you must have serious credibility problems.)

at the end of the day - Means when everything has been taken into consideration, this is the important thing... It took you a whole day? Or will it be an evening affair?


~~~


Though I have a very full plate, at the end of the day, it was no problem to think outside the box and devise a twelve-step program to limit your use of such expressions:


- Recognize that you have a problem habit (if you do).

- Pay Attention to when you use these phrases and how they sound.

- What is your reason for using the particular phrase?.

- Know that you want to stop to improve your presentation of self.

- Make a commitment.

- Learn to express yourself more effectively... not easy.

- Accept responsibility - only you can do this.

- Enlist support.

- Find suitable phrases for reflex situations.

- Punish yourself.

- Reward yourself.

- Persevere.

I’m not gonna lie to you. It’s difficult to change one’s habits. But that's all folks! I’m leaving the hard stuff up to you. Go for it! LOL.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Götterdämmerung

A lot of you have asked me about my name (pronounced Gutrune, gʊd'rūn'), and I usually point out that I named myself after a favorite actress, the lovely Gudrun Landgrebe (not well known in the U.S.). The original Gudrun, however, was a major figure in Norse mythology. She was really a very sweet person, but sometimes bad things happen to nice people. I hope this summary of the legend isn't too boring.

Gudrun (Guðrún Gjúkadóttir) had two brothers and a half brother: Gunnar, Hogni, and Gotthorm.

In the tale, Gudrun, who is without husband, falls in love with Sigurd. Sigurd himself is in love with the valkyrie Brynhilde, and pays no attention to Gudrun. Gudrun's brother Gunnar, however, wishes to marry Brynhilde, and this is impossible because Brynhilde has sworn to marry only a man who can defeat her in combat. Only Sigurd can do this. **SIGH**

Gudrun's ever-helpful mother provides a potion to make Sigurd forget his love for Brynhilde and recognize Gudrun's beauty and passion for him. However, Gunnar, exrecising his authority as Gudrun's brother, will allow Sigurd to marry Gudrun only under the condition that Sigurd also win Brynhilde for him. **DOUBLE SIGH**

Sigurd does this. Disguised as Gunnar, he passes Brynhilde's test, and an astonished Brynhilde accepts him as a suitor. The two queens, Gudrun and Brynhilde, are married on the same day.

Later, Brynhild and Gudrun are bathing together in the Rhine River (apparently comparing racks). Brynhilde comments that the water washing Gudrun will soon wash a greater beauty (herself?). Gudrun, more than a little annoyed at the remark, clues Brynhilde in. When Brynhilde learns that she had been tricked into marrying Gunnar, she plots revenge and (ashamedly) tells Gunnar that Sigurd had overstepped the bounds of propriety with her. Naturally, Gunnar gets very angry, and he has Sigurd killed (by Gotthorm). The vengeful Brynhilde goes on to kill Sigurd's three-year-old son, and wills her own self to die. When Sigurd's funeral pyre is aflame, Brynhilde throws herself upon it – thus passing on together into the realm of Hel.

Poor Gudrun is completely overwhelmed. Wracked with sorrow and delirious with grief, she predicts the death of her brother Gunnar. Out of her wits, she goes to live in the forest.

Meanwhile, King Atli's (Attila the Hun's) Hunnic Empire continues to grow. Although Atli had overthrown the Goths and seized many treasures, legends of gold and the beauty of Gudrun (YES!!!!) catch his interest. Atli wants both, and his Huns hasten westward.

Though not looking, our poor widowed queen has found another king to marry. Urged on by her mother, she marries Atli. Foremost in Atli's mind, however, is the rumored gold. Atli and Gudrun go to live in Hunland.

Eventually, obsessed by the idea of the gold, and thinking he can somehow get his hands on it , Atli summons Gunnar and his brother Hogni to Hunland. His herald claims that the King of the Huns wishes only for their assistance. He is growing old and wants his sons by Gudrun, Erp and Eitill, to have strong protectors after his death. He implies that Gunnar and Hogni might one day rule the Hunnic Empire in their names. Although Gunnar suspects a trap, he and Hogni make the trip.

When Gunnar and Hogni reach Hunland, the real reason for the invitation becomes apparent. At first Atli demands gold as the price for their lives. His huns burst out and rush them from their mead hall, but the brothers beat back the attack.

Seeing that the brothers are powerful fighters, he shifts tack to the idea that, since Gudrun is now his wife, they owe him the gold in compensation for Sigurd's death. Gunnar and Hogni know this is not Gudrun's idea, and besides the battle has already begun. They call upon their Goth allies amongst the huns, and carnage ensues in a battle for the mead hall. They capture Atli. Gudrun, however, pleads for his life. Mocking him as an unfit warrior, they let him go.

Atli then goes throughout the countryside rallying his warriors who return to beseige the mead hall. Finally they burn it forcing out the defenders and taking Gunnar and Hogni into captivity. Gudrun pleads for them, but Hogni is killed and Gunnar is cast into a pit of adders. Gudrun sends Gunnar a harp, and the music stills the snakes, except one, which bites him... Gudrun hears him cry out as he dies. Gudrun is once again heartbroken and furious.

There are Viking funerals for Gunnar, Hogni, and the fallen Huns, and a funeral feast is readied in the remains of Atli's mead hall and palace.

NOW FOR THE GOOD PART:

Finally appearing at the feast, Gudrun presents two goblets to her husband, toasting his health.

As he drinks deep from the goblets, Atli feels regret over the loss of the gold. However, he also feels satisfaction that Gunnar is dead. Gudrun then announces that, in vengeance for her brothers, she has slain their sons Erp and Eitil. The goblets were made from their skulls and had been filled with a mixture of their blood and honey. The remnants of their bodies have been fed to Atli's hounds. As the mead hall explodes in horror and anguish, Atli turns pale and falls into a swoon. He is carried to his bed, as sick though he had been poisoned.

Gudrun is not yet done. She enters his bedroom, wakes him, and drives a knife into his breast. She then sets fire to the hall.

Full of sadness and remorse and detesting her life, she tries to drown herself by jumping into the sea with an armful of stones. The waves find her revenge fitting, however, and instead of drowning her, carry her to Sweden, where she marries another king, Jónakr.
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N.B. ~ "It ain't over 'til the fat lady sings" is a reference to Brynhilde's famous death on the pyre in the opera Götterdämmerung. It means we should not assume the outcome of an activity. It plays upon an American working class perception of Grand Opera with overweight sopranos singing Brynhilde's final arias.

Various name spellings:

Atli = Attila
Brynhilde = Brynhildr, Brünhild, Brunhilde, Brunnhilda
Gudrun = Gutrune
Gunnar = Gunther
Hogni = Hagen
Sigurd = Siegfried


SOURCE: Various Wikipedia articles